Life Lessons

I've learned that you can't blame your location for the circumstances in your life. It's not where you live that is the problem, it's how you live.

I've learned that if you keep covering your wounds they will never heal. It's just like a band-aid, you see. Just the same a cut will never dry up if you keep plastering it with creams and band-aids, an emotional bruise won't heal if you keep hiding it and pretending it never happened. As humans, we scar; but they are not there for us to mess with, they just serve as reminders that through it all, we are still alive. I've learned that talking about painful things only helps if you are ready to talk about them and if the person you are talking to is ready to listen. I've learned that being kind to everyone has its disadvantages; but karma will be a better teacher than I could ever be. I've learned that there is nothing wrong with crying. If that is what makes you feel better then cry your heart out. Tears never run out so they can never be wasted.

I've learned that although it is natural to think highly of your elderly relatives you have to remember that before they are your parents or aunts and uncles, they are human. We all make mistakes and you can bet it's those same mistakes that make them who they are today. I've learned that keeping walls up does less of keeping others out and more of keeping you in. In order to get you first have to learn to give. No one is going to teach you how to love if you don't let them get close enough. I've learned that heartbreak and depression hurt more than broken bones and bruises. Where a bone breaks it heals itself; where a heart breaks will forever leave a mark. I've learned that sometimes it is okay to give up. It does not mean you are too weak to keep going; it means you are strong enough to let go. No one knows what is best for you except you.

I've learned that if you love half-heartedly then that is what you are going to get in return. You can't put in minimal effort and expect it to yield maximum reward. I've learned that you can't love someone who continuously hurts you. As hard as it seems, you just have to let go and think about yourself. Not everyone deserves to have someone. I've learned that having expectations for people only leads to disappointment. No one will ever live up to the person you think they are. We all have secrets and regrets. I've learned that I love you does not always make everything better; sometimes it hurts more. We have to remember "love" is more of an action than a word. It is supposed to be a verb too, not just a noun.

I've learned that some things are better left unsaid, unread, and undone. Don't go out of your way to break your own heart. Everything will reveal itself in due time; don't go searching for it. I've learned that tomorrow does not always come and you should appreciate the present. But it's not every day you wake up you will be strong enough to slap on a smile. Sometimes life kicks you in the ass and it's okay to take a little time to get back up. I've learned that greed and commitment are like oil and water. You can't commit yourself to anyone or anything if you are always wanting more. I've learned that you can't allow outside things and people to control what's inside of you. You have to be in control of yourself and your emotions at all times.

I've learned that if you keep looking back, you will miss what is standing right in front of you. You can't look behind you and walk forward at the same time. Once that figurative door closes and those emotional wounds heal, they no longer have relevance. Lock that door, throw away the key, leave everything behind it, and never look back.

I've learned that there is nothing wrong with changing for someone you love who loves you back. No one knows you as good as the one you're with, and if they are trying to help you to become a better person then let them. It's something that can benefit the both of you in the long run. I've learned that we are supposed to listen twice as much as we speak, but shouldn't believe half of what we hear. Not everyone has your best interest at heart and not everyone has the right to speak into your life. I've learned that you can't follow someone who is going nowhere. Pick your companions wisely.

I've learned that complaining about something does not change the fact nor does it make you feel better. The complaints just spew out like brain sewage and in the end you find yourself in the same position you were in before your oral diarrhea. If you don't like something, change it. I've learned that it's okay to be scared. We don't always have all the answers--and we're not supposed to. I've learned that there's no greater joy than being with someone who cares as much about you as you do about them. Neither love nor happiness can be forced; and there is no mistaking either of them. Either you feel it or you don't.

I've learned that life is as complicated or as simple as you want it to be. All you have to do is choose. But at the end of it all--whether we are happy, sad, or in between--none of us are going to survive it.