Life, As It Begins

Quite a bit has happened since we last spoke, to say the least.

I graduated from University, moved back home and landed my first full-time 40-hours-a-week job -- all in a matter of three months. And in an economy like this one, we all know it would be a grave understatement to say that I am one of the lucky blessed ones.

I packed up and moved out of the apartment that I had called home for the past two years, left the city I called home for the past four years, and made the "horrid" and "disparaging" move (wait for it) ... back ... into ... my parent's house.

(cue dramatic music)

My life, as society deems it, has just begun.

I have still been waging a losing war with what normal people would call "emotions", or what I would call a sea of inconsistent, enigmatic and uncontrollable disturbances, too.

In between worrying if I would get a job, worrying if my job would have anything to do with what I dedicated myself to for four years, worrying if my brother would get a job, considering a move out of the country, and trying to figure out if I should render myself an invalid who will end up with 1,000 cats, incessant allergies and some serious drugs to numb the pain of my loneliness, it's no wonder I have not found the time to update my beloved readers.

But not once did I ever forget how good it felt to express myself through prose, in my most sarcastic and unrestricted manner as I have for the past four years, right here, just like this, for everyone to see. Never did I forget how gratifying a feeling it was to have readers tell me they love what I write, are happy someone out there understands, and want me to keep writing, forever.

Never did I once forget how accepting and welcoming the blog world has been to me. And how beautifully liberating it is to release all the built-up feelings of finding out your life was never what you thought it was all along and things are almost never what they seem that can truly keep you captive in your own being.

Fear not, my friends.

I am back.

Opposites

Isn't it funny how the world keeps spinning no matter how broken you are inside?

No matter how much you wish that the sun would stop shining, the clock would stop ticking, the world would stop spinning.. And every one would just pause for just a minute and acknowledge the fact that your heart is shredded, your body is weak and you want nothing more than a comfortable bed and a tissue.

It's that can't eat, can't sleep I-wish-I-knew-it-would-end-this-way type of pain. The kind that makes you feel like the world may as well just end now because it clearly isn't what you thought it was to begin with.

But that is just it.. The world does not revolve because we tell it to. It spins because it has to; just the same as the grass has to grow, the sun has to shine, the birds have to chirp. Everything has its place in the balance of life.

And just like the good times never last, the heartache will eventually subside.

The fact is that things are always going to happen that make us feel like we have no reason to keep going, but there is always a better option than quitting. Just imagine how much better happiness feels when you have already experienced pain; how much better winning feels when you have already failed. Good just wouldn't be good if it wasn't for bad.

And even though right now I feel like this pain will never go away, I already know within myself that in due time, something beautiful is going to replace it.  Something so beautiful, in fact, that I would rewind and do this all over again just to get back to that same happy place that would not exist if it weren't for the sad one.

So until then, I'm dusting off my shoulders and picking myself up off the floor--because the longer I wait, the more chances I give other people to step on me while they walk by.

And I'd rather not be roadkill.

The Change; Will you be a part of it?

There are times when I complain about the complacency of the public in a world where the very same public is being exploited openly and carelessly, and then there are times when people, as few as they may be, finally give me a little bit of hope.

On October 5, the official declaration of the occupation of Wall Street was released, and if ever I was proud of American people, it is now. This is a huge moment in history.

Here it is:

"As we gather together in solidarity to express a feeling of mass injustice, we must not lose sight of what brought us together. We write so that all people who feel wronged by the corporate forces of the world can know that we are your allies.


As one people, united, we acknowledge the reality: that the future of the human race requires the cooperation of its members; that our system must protect our rights, and upon corruption of that system, it is up to the individuals to protect their own rights, and those of their neighbors; that a democratic government derives its just power from the people, but corporations do not seek consent to extract wealth from the people and the Earth; and that no true democracy is attainable when the process is determined by economic power.


We come to you at a time when corporations, which place profit over people, self-interest over justice, and oppression over equality, run our governments.


We have peaceably assembled here, as is our right, to let these facts be known.


They have taken our houses through an illegal foreclosure process, despite not having the original mortgage.


They have taken bailouts from taxpayers with impunity, and continue to give Executives exorbitant bonuses.


They have perpetuated inequality and discrimination in the workplace based on age, the color of one's skin, sex, gender identity and sexual orientation.


They have poisoned the food supply through negligence, and undermined the farming system through monopolization.


They have profited off of the torture, confinement, and cruel treatment of countless animals, and actively hide these practices.


They have continuously sought to strip employees of the right to negotiate for better pay and safer working conditions.


They have held students hostage with tens of thousands of dollars of debt on education, which is itself a human right.


They have consistently outsourced labor and used that outsourcing as leverage to cut workers' healthcare and pay.


They have influenced the courts to achieve the same rights as people, with none of the culpability or responsibility.


They have spent millions of dollars on legal teams that look for ways to get them out of contracts in regards to health insurance.


They have sold our privacy as a commodity.


They have used the military and police force to prevent freedom of the press.


They have deliberately declined to recall faulty products endangering lives in pursuit of profit.


They determine economic policy, despite the catastrophic failures their policies have produced and continue to produce.


They have donated large sums of money to politicians, who are responsible for regulating them.


They continue to block alternate forms of energy to keep us dependent on oil.


They continue to block generic forms of medicine that could save people's lives or provide relief in order to protect investments that have already turned a substantial profit.


They have purposely covered up oil spills, accidents, faulty bookkeeping, and inactive ingredients in pursuit of profit.


They purposefully keep people misinformed and fearful through their control of the media.


They have accepted private contracts to murder prisoners even when presented with serious doubts about their guilt.


They have perpetuated colonialism at home and abroad.


They have participated in the torture and murder of innocent civilians overseas.


They continue to create weapons of mass destruction in order to receive government contracts. *


To the people of the world,


We, the New York City General Assembly occupying Wall Street in Liberty Square, urge you to assert your power.


Exercise your right to peaceably assemble; occupy public space; create a process to address the problems we face, and generate solutions accessible to everyone.


To all communities that take action and form groups in the spirit of direct democracy, we offer support, documentation, and all of the resources at our disposal.


Join us and make your voices heard!"

Never forget that it only takes one spark to start a fire. My weapon is my writing. With my pen and paper, from right here on this blog, my voice is being heard. I am doing my part.

What will you do?