tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5116001899472229622010-07-31T18:36:15.826-04:00*Gasp* She Wants To Be A JournalistI am quite arbitrary and at times very passionate. I write it as I see it and as I feel it. People seem to find that entertaining.Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.comBlogger120125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-44219543054677916372010-07-30T16:19:00.013-04:002010-07-31T18:36:15.913-04:002010-07-31T18:36:15.913-04:00Life LessonsI've learned that you can't blame your location for the circumstances in your life. It's not where you live that is the problem, it's how you live.<br />
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I've learned that if you keep covering your wounds they will never heal. It's just like a band-aid, you see. Just the same a cut will never dry up if you keep plastering it with creams and band-aids, an emotional bruise won't heal if you keep hiding it and pretending it never happened. As humans, we scar; but they are not there for us to mess with, they just serve as reminders that through it all, we are still alive. I've learned that talking about painful things only helps if you are ready to talk about them and if the person you are talking to is ready to listen. I've learned that being kind to everyone has its disadvantages; but karma will be a better teacher than I could ever be. I've learned that there is nothing wrong with crying. If that is what makes you feel better then cry your heart out. Tears never run out so they can never be wasted.<br />
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I've learned that although it is natural to think highly of your elderly relatives you have to remember that before they are your parents or aunts and uncles, they are human. We all make mistakes and you can bet it's those same mistakes that make them who they are today. I've learned that keeping walls up does less of keeping others out and more of keeping you in. In order to get you first have to learn to give. No one is going to teach you how to love if you don't let them get close enough. I've learned that heartbreak and depression hurt more than broken bones and bruises. Where a bone breaks it heals itself; where a heart breaks will forever leave a mark. I've learned that sometimes it is okay to give up. It does not mean you are too weak to keep going; it means you are strong enough to let go. No one knows what is best for you except you.<br />
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I've learned that if you love half-heartedly then that is what you are going to get in return. You can't put in minimal effort and expect it to yield maximum reward. I've learned that you can't love someone who continuously hurts you. As hard as it seems, you just have to let go and think about yourself. Not everyone deserves to have someone. I've learned that having expectations for people only leads to disappointment. No one will ever live up to the person you think they are. We all have secrets and regrets. I've learned that <i>I love you</i> does not always make everything better; sometimes it hurts more. We have to remember "love" is more of an action than a word. It is supposed to be a verb too, not just a noun.<br />
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I've learned that some things are better left unsaid, unread, and undone. Don't go out of your way to break your own heart. Everything will reveal itself in due time; don't go searching for it. I've learned that tomorrow does not always come and you should appreciate the present. But its not every day you wake up you will be strong enough to slap on a smile. Sometimes life kicks you in the ass and it's okay to take <i>a little</i> time to get back up. I've learned that greed and commitment are like oil and water. You can't commit yourself to anyone or anything if you are always wanting more. I've learned that you can't allow outside things and people to control what's inside of you. You have to be in control of yourself and your emotions at all times.<br />
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I've learned that if you keep looking back, you will miss what is standing right in front of you. You can't look behind you and walk forward at the same time. Once that figurative door closes, and those emotional wounds heal, they no longer have relevance. Lock that door, throw away the key, leave everything behind it, and never look back.<br />
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I've learned that there is nothing wrong with changing for someone you love who loves you back. No one knows you as good as the one you're with, and if they are trying to help you to become a better person then let them. It's something that can benefit the both of you in the long run. I've learned that we are supposed to listen twice as much as we speak, but shouldn't believe half of what we hear. Not everyone has your best interest at heart.<br />
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I've learned that complaining about something does not change the fact nor does it make you feel better. The complaints just spew out like brain sewage and in the end you find yourself in the same position you were in before your oral diarrhea. If you don't like something, change it. I've learned that it's okay to be scared. We don't always have all the answers--and we're not supposed to. I've learned that there's no greater joy than being with someone who cares as much about you as you do about them. Neither love nor happiness can be forced; and there is no mistaking either of them. Either you feel it or you don't.<br />
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I've learned that life is as complicated or as simple as you want it to be. All you have to do is choose. But at the end of it all--whether we are happy, sad, or in between--<i>none</i> of us are going to survive it.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-4421954305467791637?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-61850571195787559622010-07-27T21:32:00.008-04:002010-07-30T15:22:38.088-04:002010-07-30T15:22:38.088-04:00Shit Ranting with an Angry HeartIs the road to deception really paved with good intentions?<br />
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I think not. I have always wondered to myself about people who live a lie, especially those who go to church every Sunday and spend their life teaching their children how to live a Christian life. How am I supposed to take you seriously when you have three different families with children all the same age and a wife? Or when you spend half your time here and half your time elsewhere living the life of a bachelor when you clearly have a family to support?<br />
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Some people are so twisted. I cannot even live with myself after I lie about going to watch Despicable Me when I really plan on watching Grown Ups. How can someone look at him or herself in the mirror meanwhile leading two lives? How can you look at your child in the morning and your other man or woman in the evening?<br />
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I figure after a while, people grow up and out of their "I'm young free and uncommitted" phase and learn to settle their ass down and be the best person they can be. I've been mistaken. All my life I've given people the benefit of the doubt. I am friends with everyone and anyone and I am quicker to forgive than to forget someone. I've always been the person who convinces people to just let it go; after all I've been disappointed a million times, by a billion different people and I'm still alive.<br />
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But this one hurts.<br />
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It's one thing to forgive someone's lie when you see that person but once every holiday, and it's one thing when someone only lies to you about <i>something</i> or <i>someone. </i>But what happens when they <i>are</i> the lie. What happens when you find out that the sweet little girl next door who you thought was your friend is not so sweet, spends too much time with the boys next door--or should I say, all the boys in the neighbourhood--and is not truly your friend at all. Granted it is not my place to judge anyone by their choices, if it's the neighbourhood that makes you happy then by all means circle it, twice if it's better the second time around. But don't drag me into your little lie. If you're a bitch you better be a bitch when I meet you and every day thereafter. You're not allowed to change your entire being halfway through our friendship.<br />
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Yeah, I said it. And believe me, I mean it.<br />
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What's more, I hate finding out about something through the grape vine. If you have something to say then tell me. All five feet two inches of me can handle it. (Sounds intimidating doesn't it?) I promise that though I may have the urge to slap you across the face, chances are I probably won't. But the important part is that I will forever appreciate your honesty.<br />
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I have a lot of anger and resentment in my heart. So much that I am almost certain it is unsafe. I found out too many things in one day, and my opinion on some important people and largely life itself took a turn for the worst. In the end, I find, a male-female relationship is no different from a friend-friend relationship--not that I ever thought it was. No matter how careful you are at picking your friends or significant other, you never really know their long-term intentions; but one thing you can always be sure of is that people <i>always</i> have ulterior motives.<br />
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The good part? Sometimes those motives can benefit you too. You just have to choose wisely--very wisely.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-6185057119578755962?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-87842393205853562162010-07-26T17:44:00.004-04:002010-07-30T10:04:59.935-04:002010-07-30T10:04:59.935-04:00Love & MarriageGrowing up in a family full of men, I was never the type to fantasize about a fairy-tale relationship with a breath-taking wedding and a happily ever after.<br />
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Sure I read the books and saw the movies: I know all about the beautiful princesses who kissed the frog and lived under the sea, the evil witches who handed out poisonous fruit and sleeping spells, the stepmother who turned her stepdaughter into a maid, and their subsequent happy endings. All of that was nice to think about and good to read, but let's face it, stories are just stories--and that is all they will ever be.<br />
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These days we are so far from fairy-tales that I don't even think people still teach their kids about Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, or Rapunzel. It is hard enough for a child to observe a healthy and stable home life without both parents, what good would it do to teach them about something that you as a parent have not even been able to find.<br />
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I don't think we remember how important it is to have a mother and father present at home. It's more than just a picturesque fa<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial, sans-serif; line-height: 19px;"><em style="font-style: normal;">ç</em></span>ade; it provides your child with proper stability, morals, and understanding of the value of a family unit. I know I recently said that "do as I say not as I do" makes sense; but when it comes to basic childhood moulding, what you see is much more impressionable than what you hear. And although those first few years of life are what create each of us, it does not mean that it is okay to walk out on a teenager or adolescent.<br />
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Relationships at home are insight to the relationships we will eventually have. You might never have heard it in this context but what you see is certainly what you get--unless of course you make a serious effort to change that.<br />
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This blog is not dedicated to bashing humanity, though I am sure I could go on for days. I was inspired by a friend of mine, not much older than I am, who recently married the love of his life. I knew he was crazy about her but I never expected him to take that next step. Still, I cannot say how proud I am that he did. I am so used to being disappointed by people's relationships, whether it's because they break up or because one of them exercises bad judgement, but it always hurts me when I see a promising young couple break-up. As weird as that sounds, I know I am not the only hopeless romantic who looks on to other couple's hoping they make it through this rough world.<br />
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I've always felt like if you truly love someone there's no limit to the things you will do to maintain a relationship with that person. The little things that people allow to break them up after so long are not supposed to be that powerful. People are too quick to jump up and talk about independency and the death of chivalry, but no one is willing to compromise anymore. Women seem to have something to prove by paying for their own meal or opening their own door, and then they want to complain when a guy does not do it for them. Well, what do you expect when we don't teach them how to do things like that anymore or appreciate the very few who do?<br />
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I think the world is confused. We no longer know what we want from others or what is acceptable. Something so conventional as marriage now seems like a foreign concept. Gays and lesbians are fighting for it more than the traditional couples. No one believes in the sanctity of marriage anymore; in fighting to keep families together. No one believes in love. No one believes in forever.<br />
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But who do you think created that monster?<br />
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We did; that's who.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-8784239320585356216?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-87108678917817870132010-07-23T15:44:00.001-04:002010-07-27T00:40:15.774-04:002010-07-27T00:40:15.774-04:00Ranch AdventuresI spent the past year blaming Orlando for my shitty, for lack of a better word, circumstances but I am just now realising that it has nothing to do with where I am. It's just Life teaching me how to be alone.<br />
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Let me clarify, though, this blog is not a complaint. I might be alone but I am never lonely--due in part to my supportive nuclear family, my many friends and acquaintances, and my wonderful <i>boyfriend.</i> It has been far too long since <i>brother unlucky</i> has given me something to write about, mostly because it has been a while since I visited the land of alligators. I am wondering if that is actually a good thing, though, considering his nickname lends itself to describing the unfortunate events he encounters. Anyway, I have indeed had my own adventures.<br />
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Last Sunday there was a day party called Perfect X to which I had all intentions of attending--during the day. Due to unforeseen circumstances <i>chiney tings</i> and I arrived at 10 30 p.m., only about half an hour before the party was scheduled to end. (Oh, the things that cease to be important when a party is free.) Nevertheless, the real adventure was the driving to and fro.<br />
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To begin, the party was on a ranch only about a few minutes away from where I live. I suppose if we had arrived there during the day as the party-keepers intended, the dark and lonely road would have been far less dark and not nearly as lonely. It is no secret that the home-owners in those areas are accustomed to and perhaps greatly enjoy the darkness that befalls when the sun goes down. Oftentimes I wonder to myself if I would enjoy living in a big house on plenty of land in the middle of nowhere with no street lights. Needless to say, I don't think I would. (Not in the US anyway.) With all that money what does it take to invest in a street light or two. I'd much prefer that option as opposed to seeing cars drive by with their bright lights pointed right at my house.<br />
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It makes you wonder as you drive by if maybe there is someone inside one of the houses who is watching you as you pollute their area with your lights. After all, don't we as humans always notice the unusual? They probably know how many cars, on average, venture into their neighbourhood and which cars belong to which house. Other than that, you'd be surprised to know that they are peeking at you through their extensive drapery as you try to figure out where you are going.<br />
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I know you might be thinking, my imagination is far too wild, but what would you say if I told you I am speaking from experience?<br />
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During my senior year, <i>bonafide, trinidad, </i>and I decided out of boredom that we would take an adventure over into the dark areas of Griffin Road and Southwest Ranches. My cousin who lives over there told me about a haunted house with a moat that he and his friends had visited before and that sounded perfect. Considering the fact that scary movies were amongst my favourites at that time in my life, a nice haunted house adventure sounded like something I would thoroughly enjoy. We got no directions, though, and spent the night driving around looking for something very hard to find. But don't be discouraged; it was adventure we wanted and adventure we got.<br />
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Upon searching for somewhere dark and desolate to pull over and use the bathroom (I am Jamaican, don't look so surprised) we encountered perhaps the most unexplained event of the night. After turning down an alley, <i>trinidad</i> and I hopped out towards the bushes. The first thing we saw when we walked up ahead was a huge brownish red stain in the road. Immediately we stopped and looked at each other as if to make sure both of us were seeing the same thing--dried up blood.<br />
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Since it was in the middle of the road, we figured it was a dead animal. We ran back to my car and turned on my lights and went back to look. No dead animal; but the stain was certainly blood. We looked at each other again and the next thing we knew we heard soft Carnival music in the distance. (For all my fellow Caribes, I don't mean Soca music.) It was the kind of music you hear when you're on a merry go-round, and coming from the middle of nowhere we could not believe it. We immediately went right back to the car, turned it around, and headed back to the main road. With my lights shining up ahead, <i>bonafide</i> pointed out a huge poster-sized portrait of a native american woman just ahead. The picture was surrounded by flowers and candles and none of us had noticed it before. To not get carried away, we ruled it out as one of those RIP things that the family of the deceased put up in memory of their loved one.<br />
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Like true scary movie participants, we decided to keep looking for trouble. On that search I sure did notice people peeking through curtains as we drove by. There was one person whose shadow was printed out in its entirety on the window pane. I stopped to intensify the mood until I saw the door open. This was no stranger than the car that appeared out of nowhere with the bright blue light that seemed to trail it. It was just as strange when that same car started to follow me.<br />
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Needless to say, we never found the house. Maybe one day I'll go looking again. A good adventure with my friends is never anything short of entertaining.<br />
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Just like the unintentional wrong-side-of-the-road-driving that had me and <i>chiney ting</i> dying with laughter after the "day party" last sunday.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-8710867891781787013?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-25004299504824986302010-07-17T17:47:00.005-04:002010-07-30T10:16:32.351-04:002010-07-30T10:16:32.351-04:00What is your Equation?I've heard the quote "do as I say not as I do" and often thought to myself "well isn't that hypocritical." In retrospect, and now that I am older of course, it makes a whole lot of sense.<br />
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Sometimes you just can't help your situation, but that doesn't mean you'd wish it on even your worst enemy. More often than not our brains and emotions work against each other. Half of you tells you to do this, meanwhile the other half begs you to do that. Naturally, I think it is safe to say that we are not always in control. (Although as the highest life-forms on the planet none of us like to be told we are not in full control at any given time.)<br />
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The truth is, it's easier to hand out poetic advice than to swallow it yourself. It is also easier--for most people anyway--to listen to another person's situation than to talk about his or her own.<br />
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I've always been good at being poetic--after all I am a writer. As for figuring out what to do with my own life, most of the times that seems to escape me. And in the midst of my emotional and perhaps overly dramatic charades I always have a moment to myself where I think "Wow. Are you the biggest <s>bullshitter</s> liar on the planet or what." For someone who preaches <u>The Secret</u> and <i>you-get-what-you-give-so-send-the-universe-the-right-message, </i>what the hell is wrong with my universe? By all accounts my life is supposed to be something of a Utopia. Yet for some reason perfection is as far away from existence as flying unicorns and leprechauns at the end of rainbows. (What's a math teacher who is no good at math?)<br />
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Unfortunately for us, life is nothing like mathematics. In math, two plus two <b>always </b>equals four; there is no way around it. For every word problem there is a solution; all it takes is a little memorization but the equation is there--and it never changes. In life, there is no equation but the one you decide to make on your own. Whichever equation you think fits your word problem best is the one you use. Needless to say, the right solution is never a sure thing. It is never definite. Two people who use the same equation almost never get the same result.<br />
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Of all the living creatures on this planet, I'm starting to think we are the most dormant and confused. Even the little turtles my units discovered in our backyard this evening have it all figured out. Granted, they usually head to the water at nighttime, but upon inadvertently digging up the nest they built in our garden, their natural instinct kicked into gear. These little turtles with no help, no instruction, no guidance, and shells soft enough to be stepped on and cracked into pieces, were caught unaware and still managed to get it together. (Talk about making lemonade with the lemons being thrown at you.) They are born with the inherent inclination that if nothing else, they need to get to the water. Everything after that is a learning experience that teaches them how to survive the odds.<br />
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Seems to me that we just might be the only "animals" who have yet to figure out what mother nature intended for us. We seem to have forgotten that all we really should be doing is fighting for basic survival--just like the turtles, the birds, the fish, the lizards, and well... every thing else in the world.<br />
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The last time I checked, emotions don't kill. They serve as nothing else but a damned distraction.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-2500429950482498630?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-21756448214378229002010-07-11T13:11:00.001-04:002010-07-18T08:09:17.162-04:002010-07-18T08:09:17.162-04:00My Cup Runneth OverI was reading through some of my older blogs and came across one about the seemingly never-ending apartment hunting I did earlier this year.<br />
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It talked about how excited I was to be living with 3 friends instead of unknown hermits, and how we could share the fridge not just with designated spaces but also with content. I cook today; you cook tomorrow. I'll wash the dishes next day and you clean the kitchen the day after. One milk, one butter, one loaf of bread, one happy family.<br />
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It's too bad in life things rarely ever happen the way you want them to. People don't practise to put your needs before their own--and why should they. At the end of the day, we live in a lonely and selfish I'm-independent-so-I-don't-need-you-as-much-as-you-think-I-need-you world filled with people who scramble around everyday of their life only so they can compare their material things that make them so happy at the week's end.<br />
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I can't say how happy I am that I've realised this so early. It could have taken half my energy, all of my tears, and a lifetime of failed attempts at trying to accommodate others. It doesn't mean I'm going to live a selfish life too, and I will never agree that that is the key to happiness. If you ask me, the solution lies within the things we are teaching each other. We don't teach people how to care anymore; we teach them how to be careful. You're supposed to get what you give so why not give love. What better a gift than to know you're not alone--than to know that there are a handful of people who can be held accountable for the blessing of companionship in your life. <i>Everyone </i>needs <i>someone.</i><br />
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Lucky for me I have more than a handful. And maybe where I went wrong was trying to fill more hands than what I was born with. It's like adding water to a cup that is already three quarters full. Eventually the water starts spilling over and soon you can hardly tell which is new and which is old because at some point the contents of the cup got mixed and for all you know some of the old water spilled out in the overflow and you're left with a cup full of water you no longer recognise.<br />
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I can't afford for my cup of good water to spill over or be mixed. If anything, i'll just have to find another cup: there is plenty more love for me to share and plenty of people whom I have yet to meet & befriend.<br />
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If even my second cup is being stubborn, then i'll just have to find another way to change the world.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-2175644821437822900?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-77703076083460029662010-07-08T13:43:00.001-04:002010-07-09T09:45:42.433-04:002010-07-09T09:45:42.433-04:00One Year LaterI had every intention to write a blog on my one year anniversary even if I had absolutely nothing to say. But the day has passed and I am just getting around to writing.<br />
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If you want to know what I have been doing...Well, it is really not much of anything. I don't think I have a viable excuse for missing out on it--although training with the boyfriend has kept me quite busy lately. I am afraid that when he is gone I am going to miss having something to do on tuesdays, wednesdays, and thursdays on top of already missing him. On the positive side...Umm, I'll get back to that.<br />
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As for reflecting on my first year as a blogger, I have mixed emotions. (In my life right now I have mixed emotions so maybe that is indirectly playing its part.) I kind of figured that by this time I would have a larger following and would have written my every life experience. I certainly never expected to skip so many days, and only post once or twice a month. What with my life being so boring you would think I have enough time to simply sit down and write<br />
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I've never ever really had a problem coming up with something to write about. It seems as though all I really need to do is log in, press "new post" and voila! I'd have a page-long of utter rubbish--entertaining rubbish but rubbish indeed. Would you believe me if I told you that 90 percent of my blogs came straight from my head in a you-better-sit-down-and-type-whatever-comes-to-mind-because-you-have-skipped-out-on-enough-blog-days kind of way. People have seen me do it, and it always gets me thinking when they turn to me and say "How do you do it? I wish I could just sit down and write like that" because it's something that just comes so naturally to me.<br />
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So why don't I write more often, you say? Ah, well I knew that was coming but still do not have an answer. I guess the answer lies somewhere in between me not wanting to turn on the computer at all and my phone suddenly not being able to properly access this blogger website. I find that last summer when my phone allowed me to post I was typing more blogs than BBMs. Now, I sit on the phone too often yet blog too little.<br />
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I have plenty of time to fix that, though. And today is just as good a day to fix it as any.<br />
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Happy one year!<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7770307608346002966?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-71476821735000016872010-07-01T13:56:00.001-04:002010-07-30T10:09:38.269-04:002010-07-30T10:09:38.269-04:00Rough SeasEver since the day we went fishing my stomach has not been the same.<br />
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Last friday during our vacation the units, <i>brother unlucky</i>, <i>Trini, </i>the <i>boyfriend </i>and I went out on a fishing boat. It wasn't the boat we always go on but what is a trip to the Keys without a trip on the seas. We always come back boasting coolers (and yes I meant to pluralise that) full of fish and this trip was not supposed to be any different.<br />
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We weren't so lucky.<br />
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I think all of us would rather blame the location--and maybe even the oil spill--for the small amount of fish we caught, but it was mother nature who took us on that night because the fish were present.<br />
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The week was super relaxing, though we spent most of it watching football and planning all other events around the matches. When everyone supports a different team it just means dedicating more time to watching than just one day. (Note to self: Do not plan a trip with men during the World Cup.)<br />
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The weather was perfect, the people were friendly, and the island breeze felt good when relaxing by the pool, walking around town, and laying out at the beach. Who doesn't like a nice breeze mixed in with some heavy sunshine?<br />
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<i>About half the boat; that's who.</i><br />
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We chose what we thought was the least windy of our days to head out to sea. We even decided to go at night to escape the tremendous heat. But it seems as if the trip was doomed from the start.<br />
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As a precaution, mother dearest, the boyfriend and I decided to take the seasick pill considering the fact that we are somewhat prone to it. (Sure you can take a moment to gasp. Yes; the mermaid gets seasick. Jaw-dropping shocker I know.) I definitely felt like that was the night I was going to get sick. In a sick and twisted turn of events, I was the only one in the group who didn't.<br />
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The boat left the dock around 7pm, and we sailed for about an hour and 20 minutes before finding the perfect location. By 9 o clock, half an hour later, about 20 of the boat's approximately 30 passengers were hurling their guts overboard. All around me all I could hear--besides the splish-splash of the water on the side of the boat--was urghhh and aghhh and blehh. You would think that after a while of that you would want to throw up yourself. I didn't. But everyone else caught on. It was something like an epidemic. One by one everyone slowly stopped fishing.<br />
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I won't take credit for being the only soldier on the boat though, as there were a few completely <s>weird</s> normal people in the bow who fished the entire night as if the right-side-up-ness of the boat was not being threatened with every mini-tsunami. That impressed me. I certainly couldn't fish the whole time, what with the wind blowing throw up in my face from all sides. Eventually, only about five people out of the whole boat were still fishing, and I was not one of them. I took the time to lay down and ensure that I kept what was in my stomach in my stomach.<br />
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It took a lot of concentration.<br />
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Speaking of soldier, I have to hand it to the boyfriend who caught the biggest fish in our group. He will never be able to live down the fact that he was throwing up and reeling in fish simultaneously. Had all of us kept fishing no doubt we would have filled our buckets as we usually do; but the last thing on anyone's mind was fishing. (They were too busy counting down the hours until the boat would start moving at 11 30.)<br />
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Looking back, everyone can laugh about it. (And the throw up really made for good chum. That's why the lady in the back who fished all night ended up pulling in a massive gray snapper a few minutes after the boyfriend's<i> </i>runner-up.) I know there were many prayers going around and many people yearning to go back to dry land where they can finally stay still.<br />
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The worst part of it all, though, is that the fish were certainly out--and boy were they biting.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7147682173500001687?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-75813093197969373722010-06-28T13:34:00.005-04:002010-06-28T13:54:03.016-04:002010-06-28T13:54:03.016-04:00Did You Miss Me?I am going to blame my most recent and longest hiatus on two things; World Cup and summer school. The latter, and perhaps most annoying, will no longer work as an excuse though. As of Friday, June 25, summer classes finished.<br /><br />Truth be told I was only taking two classes, but they were online, and not nearly as exciting as the classes I took last summer. One of them, though, was "Magazine Writing" which--needless to say--I did very much enjoy. Towards the end of the class we were instructed to write an article of any topic and actually submit it to a real magazine for publication. Exciting or what?<br /><br />Since then I have been debating whether or not I should publish the article on my blog, or if I should even discuss the topic. For some reason, I feel like it should not be published here before it is published in a magazine. (Crosses fingers.) Makes sense, right?<br /><br />Anyway, on to the controversial history-making month long greatest show on the planet--World Cup 2010: Live from South Africa. I have barely missed a match since it started three weeks ago, mostly because the boyfriend and Pops are here. In true Me-Him style, we are cheering for two different sides; him against my side and mine against his. (Viva Espana!!) His team, Brasil, is the team that arguably 80% of Jamaicans cheer for. How boring! Where is the competition when everyone is cheering for the same team? The funniest part to me is that im sure Brasil does not love Jamaica half as much as Jamaica loves them.<br /><br />Still, there are many things about the World Cup that have caused controversy. The USA got cheated out of two goals by Refs claiming off-side, meanwhile England didn't get a goal that clearly should have been counted. And who can ever forget the embarassing 7 nil that Portugal gave North Korea. (Did Spain really lose to Switzerland!?)<br /><br />The team that has done the worst, in my eyes, is France. (But England is giving them a run for their money.) Did they even score one goal? From what I can remember, Anelka was too busy cussing off the Coach who was too busy not shaking the other Coach's hand after his team lost. Evidently, FIFA can ban them for <s>shit</s> things like that. Shame on the French.<br /><br />Brasil plays Chile in half an hour and I hope it is a better match than the one they played against Portugal. No doubt that match fell into the top 5 most boring of the season. (And I cannot stand Cristiano Ronaldo, who seems to think the team is named after him. Selfish much?) There I was thinking it was going to be one of the best matches thus far.<br /><br />The surprises never end.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7581309319796937372?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-8521192836407057682010-05-28T13:29:00.003-04:002010-07-30T10:13:37.550-04:002010-07-30T10:13:37.550-04:00In Other NewsToday begins the highly anticipated "Memorial Weekend."<br />
<br />
Since my last post many rumours have been circulating concerning America's presence in the Caribbean country of Jamaica, as people wonder why one man--Christopher Coke--is worthy of so much trouble and media attention. Being as open as I am, I can say that some of these theories are harder to believe than others.<br />
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Still, I am not writing today about the situation at hand, though I am sure you can understand that since the event is right in my backyard I am very much affected by it. Nonetheless, those who are abroad can only watch and wait as the events unfold. In the meanwhile, I will update accordingly. (I'm a little happy about it because it gave me something interesting to write about.)<br />
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This weekend I have all intentions of enjoying myself fully. Many of my friends are coming in town for the holiday weekend and most of them intend to party, party, and party some more. Of course, as my new year's post indicated, partying nonstop is not my favourite thing to do. I much prefer to take advantage of the fact that everyone is in one place and have some sort of game or kalooki night and maybe spend a day at the beach if the weather permits.<br />
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I've noticed that the weather has been insanely bipolar all of this week, but I am hoping the rain can hold up for the weekend. Last night we had a mini-hurricane which started very sporadically after an otherwise sunny blue-sky day. Just the same, after dimsum with my cousin the day before, we decided to waste some time by walking around in the mall a little.<br />
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When it was time to leave we noticed that the great flood was outside. Being the <s>badass</s> person that I am, though, I vowed to go and get the car for her since we left the umbrella in there. Needless to say, I was soaked; and my poor little feet slopped through the inches of water beneath me.<br />
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I was never one to be afraid of water though, after all I am a swimmer.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-852119283640705768?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-62609539226736800402010-05-25T15:17:00.005-04:002010-06-28T18:39:44.714-04:002010-06-28T18:39:44.714-04:00Exhaustion of The SubjectEvidently there's still much controversy about whether or not the Jamaica Defence Force (JDF) should be fighting this war in Kingston. However, buses that were sent into Tivoli Gardens yesterday for "innocent" people came out empty. Instead, the people adamantly displayed their phones--which were allegedly taken from them by gunmen as ransom--and expressed the fact that they were not held as hostages in the community.<br />
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U.S. broadcasts showed even a dog with a cardboard sign saying "We will die for Dudus" as people stood around and demonstrated, comparing Coke to Jesus Christ. I personally believe that JDF is doing a good job. So far the numbers show 25 dead and 211 detained--women & children alike. To some it may sound like too much, to others too little; but at the end of the day history shows that out of revolution comes change.<br />
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Unfortunately, innocent people almost always get caught in a war. Many wars have been fought across the planet and some Jamaicans are advocating aggressively because 25 gunmen died? Wake up! They have all collaborated to fight against the security forces, so I say kill them all. As one person wrote, we cannot afford for them to regroup. Perimeters should be set outside of the hot spots in an effort to capture those who have escaped the onslaught. JDF should also have an unlimited access to weaponry and ammunition; it is absolutely <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">unacceptable</span> that these men should be running out of bullets in the middle of a war.<br />
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Bloodshed is never something to be proud of, but it is important that we remember that all those who remain in the battle are there by choice--worst those who are firing back at the security forces. The "innocent" who were given the opportunity to leave the area, vowed to stay there and defend Coke until the end. So be it.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-6260953922673680040?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-29364753685152483742010-05-23T19:43:00.009-04:002010-07-30T10:10:59.649-04:002010-07-30T10:10:59.649-04:00Seriously Though?I am appalled at what is going on in my home country and the international attention is detrimental to our tourism sector, which is all that the previous political party has left us with.<br />
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Ever since the extradition papers were signed by the Prime Minister (PM) for Christopher "Dudus" Coke, Kingston and Saint Andrew residents and onlookers have been on the edge of their seats.<br />
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The entire Kingston area was put on lock down sometime last week for "precautionary reasons." Everyone was sent home and all businesses closed. Yesterday the US navy arrived off the coast of Jamaica meanwhile JDF and JCF headed to Tivoli Gardens to face a stand-off that has extended into today. About an hour ago the Government declared a state of emergency for both Kingston and St. Andrew. Evidently, all gunmen have barricaded themselves inside Tivoli Gardens, joined forces against the police, and are planning to launch coordinating attacks against security forces.<br />
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Would you believe all of this is over one man? The blatant and embarrassing ignorance of majority of the people in my country never ceases to amaze me. To know that they are willing to take down the entire country just for one man is disgusting!<br />
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If you ask me, they should just blow up all of Tivoli Gardens. It may sound cruel, but logically thinking I can assume that all who remain there are either foolish beyond my understanding, or are a part of the entire ordeal. What better opportunity than now to kill <span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">all</span> of the high-risk gunmen in the country at once?<br />
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Furthermore, it will give the upcoming gunmen a chance to think twice about the life they want to live and which path they decide to travel.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-2936475368515248374?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-39158534708216684462010-05-12T13:17:00.001-04:002010-07-30T10:17:03.556-04:002010-07-30T10:17:03.556-04:00That Never HappenedI wish there was a way to just get rid of a memory or an event that you'd rather not remember.<br />
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I've been trying to think up ways to get over a regret or a mistake by learning from it and then immediately clearing it from memory. I feel like I've made many mistakes and have done many things I am not proud of. Often times I found myself putting other people's wants, needs, and interests before mine only to feel used and worthless in the end. If I could go back, there are so many things I would have done differently. But I can't; and they happened.<br />
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Now I spend plenty of time thinking about what I have done. I think of all the things I have said, all the people I have hurt, all the people who have hurt me, and I don't know where to put it. I've been told that I need to learn to let go, and I made it a priority to do just that. I spent most of my day yesterday clearing out my sentimental drawers. I threw away things I was holding and keeping for no reason; got rid of pictures and reminders I shouldn't have had so long to begin with. Yet still, I don't feel any lighter. The weight of the past still brings me down.<br />
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I think a lot about what would happen if I became rich and famous. Would all the scum from my past resurface? Would people from all over come out & say things to bring me down? I wonder why I even have skeletons to worry about in the first place. As human beings we live to sin and make mistakes. Why am I ashamed of the life I've lived? Why did I spend so much time doing things I never truly wanted to do? When did Meisha's happiness come in to play?<br />
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I need to learn to love me before I can love & be loved. I've spent years trying to convince people that self-confidence is key, and ironically enough I have none. I don't feel wholesome in myself & my accomplishments; in my relationships & my achievements. I always feel like I fall short of my goals and intentions and have no one but myself to blame. The sad part is that I've never had a problem accepting the role I play in any and everything if I had one, and I'm always the first one to take the blame.<br />
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I'm thinking maybe there are plenty of pluses to getting amnesia and I wish there was a way to induce it. What I would do to be able to forget some of the people I've met, the things I've done, and the feelings I've felt. I had hoped that by ridding myself of all physical manifestation of an event or time period I'd also rid myself of the emotional baggage. Life doesn't work like that though. It's up to you to learn what you need to from an experience and then leave it in the past where it belongs.<br />
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The universe has yet to create a reset button.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-3915853470821668446?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-173888848146201642010-05-04T17:57:00.002-04:002010-05-19T18:00:57.519-04:002010-05-19T18:00:57.519-04:00Cry For HelpIt seems as if everyday I hear something new about the country I call home and it is almost never anything good.<br /><br />The beautiful island of Jamaica declared its independence from Britain in 1962 and, after the first decade, has been struggling to do something productive. Though still a commonwealth of the Queen, the more recent Jamaican politicians have over the years proven themselves incapable of providing the country with a stable government, a safe environment, and progressive changes. Jamaica is the third most populous English-speaking country in the Americas, behind the US & Canada, and has almost nothing left to its name.<br /><br />Politicians, largely for their own short-term benefit, have sold out most if not all its monetary industries to countries in Europe & Latin America, the US, and Trinidad. Rich men in said countries have invested in large amounts of land where they build luxury hotels and condominiums like RIU and The Palmayra--places where the average Jamaican citizen cannot afford to live nor vacation. Not one hotel in Jamaica is owned by the Jamaican government and none of the proceeds from the privately owned hotels go to our country, but instead to the already wealthy investors or countries.<br /><br />They have also managed to sell out all money-making industries and have created a dangerous environment that has put a damper on the once dependable industry of tourism. Further, the tourists who do go to Jamaica are filling the pockets of those private companies that build all-inclusive hotels and expensive attractions, and transport the tourists directly from the airport to those places, where they stay for their entire vacation. Though the most popular resorts of Sandals & Beaches are not owned by another country, they are still under the management of one man, Gordon "Butch" Stuart, to whom all proceeds go.<br /><br />Since 2006, statistics show a decrease in unemployment, an increase in agricultural and tourist industries, and an overall growing economy. The biggest problem, however, as it has been for years, is controlling the crime rate in the more metropolitan areas. For years Jamaica has been at the top of the list for countries with the highest crime rate. As taxes increase and citizens inadvertently use more money than they make, it is no wonder the crime rate has significantly increased. An estimated 60% of highly educated Jamaicans live abroad--a pattern that increases along with the crime rate and low pay. Most Jamaican University graduates are faced with not being able to find a good paying job worthy of their degrees, if any at all. There are no job opportunities for those highly educated citizens, which explains the great brain drain the country has been experiencing. Now, young adults are leaving right after high school and heading to the US, England, and even other Caribbean countries.<br /><br />More recently I was informed of yet another problem; water shortage. Jamaica "the land of wood and water" is without the latter. Residents in the metropolitan area in Kingston have been placed on a water timetable. The two main sources, Mona Reservoir (capacity: 809 million gallons) and Hermitage Reservoir (capacity: 393 million gallons) are both less than half filled to capacity, leaving the capital with running pipe water for only four hours in the morning and four hours in the evening. It is not out of the ordinary for someone to wake up in the morning, turn on the pipe, and have nothing come out. Those who are more fortunate have tanks, and those who are not have buckets. During those 8 hours those less-fortunate residents make it a point to retain as much water as possible so that they can wash their hands or take a shower if necessary.<br /><br />Imagine that. Something as simple as waking up and heading to the bathroom to brush your teeth is a problem to people all over the world as it is not only Jamaica that is having a water shortage. This is a serious problem. Jamaica already owes IMF billions of dollars in debt, and were ordered to sell the country's airline, Air Jamaica, before any more money could be borrowed. The process of desalination, which is the only alternative, would cost millions of dollars in energy and in the process itself; millions that the country does not have. This water shortage has forced some schools to close early on some days and completely on others and has also forced them on some occasions to buy water for $20,000 per truck load.<br /><br />One a more international scale, Jamaica has been in the news for a man by the name of Christopher 'Dudus' Coke, the head of the Shower Posse and allegedly one of the world's most notorious narcotic kingpins. His extradition was ordered by US officials in August and the request has since been denied by the Jamaican government. This has "indirectly" resulted in the revoking of visas from many of our popular Dancehall artistes, which has since been a topic of great discussion. Both countries remain strong and steadfast in their positions; leaving critics to debate the rumoured connection between Dudus and the current elected party. Meanwhile the relationship between the US and Jamaica, and quite possibly other US-allied countries, continues to deteriorate. My opinion on the matter will remain reticent and impervious; however, I do believe that the line needs to be drawn somewhere.<br /><br />Reducing crime starts from the top down; be it first a notorious kingpin or a crooked politician.<br /><br />More along a domestic spectrum, all government school teachers are now on their second day of strike. The government allegedly owes them billions of dollars too and they have decided to make a scene of it. There is no doubt that this is not the first time the teachers have been on strike, and I can't say that their strikes have ever been successful. However, today marks the second day of schools being closed because of justifiably disgruntled teachers, meanwhile the students countrywide are supposed to be preparing for the very important CXC and Cape exams.<br /><br />Something needs to happen in Jamaica. Too many weapons have been smuggled into the country, too many politicians are in it for personal reasons, and too many people are suffering.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-17388884814620164?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-11849315447537676722010-04-30T18:49:00.007-04:002010-07-30T10:12:09.036-04:002010-07-30T10:12:09.036-04:00The Summer is BackYesterday was my last day of school for Spring semester 2010.<br />
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I ended the year off with a full score on my Spanish essay and a 92 on the last quiz. I also took the final in the morning and walked out with confidence. The only thing that somewhat shattered my confidence was the fact that I had been told the night before to be extra cautious that day.<br />
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Evidently a rumour was going around the school that there would be a possible shooting on campus for what was generally the last and biggest day of final exams. I was just leaving my old roommates' apartment on Wednesday night when I heard the news. We had had a wonderful few hour long last conversation about everything under the sun and were just about to get mushy with our goodbyes.<br />
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One of the girls in the apartment got a text message from someone who she says never sends out "forwards." The message was informing her that she should be aware of a possible shooting during "prime time" on Thursday. No details were listed and our minds began wondering. We talked about all kinds of reasons why it could be true as well as reasons why it wouldn't be.<br />
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In the end, we all decided we would not take any chances. Since we all had finals at the same time we got one of the roommates to drop us to class in the morning so we could avoid walking across campus. I also decided to tell my mother to see if she had any ideas of what I should do, and I was even considering emailing my teacher and trying to reschedule the final. She hung up with me and immediately called the UCF police, who told her they were aware of the situation and had the man under control. (What! So you mean someone was really going to shoot up the school? Is that a joke?)<br />
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The next morning I found out that the incident was published in the school newspaper the night before. It was purposely not broadcasted through our Emergency text/email messaging system because authorities did not want to alarm the students during finals; though I am not sure I agree with that message. I'd always rather be safe than sorry.<br />
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Either way, in the end, all was calm on the UCF campus. We all went, took our tests, and left.<br />
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Now I am back in my house, on summer vacation, and loving every minute of it.<br />
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<br />
<span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-size: 78%;">In memory of Alexander Joel Martin King who would have been 24 today. Gone but never forgotten.<br />
Our fallen Angel.<br />
</span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-1184931544753767672?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-73091449942137662932010-04-25T17:28:00.006-04:002010-07-30T10:07:57.711-04:002010-07-30T10:07:57.711-04:00The Bathing SuitI celebrated the last week of classes for my sophomore year with two consecutive days by the pool. Despite being three shades darker and having a peeling nose and sunburnt shoulders, I have concluded that life is better in a bathing suit.<br />
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Some think that bathing suits are not for everyone, but I think that if we could walk around in them 365 days a year, the world would be a better place.<br />
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There is a method to my madness. When I am in a bathing suit, though I am not half as confident as I portray, I still feel like there is much to be happy about, though I do realise I am quite the biased source here, considering the water is my natural habitat. (A few months into my being I was thrown into the shallow end of the pool and told to either sink or swim; obviously I swam-- and never stopped swimming.)<br />
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As for the outside-the-water parading I associate swimsuits with hot sunny beautiful relaxing days by the pool or by the sea. Either location you choose to identify with it still has a positive "life is amazing" ring to it. It also helps you work on your confidence and pride. (If you can walk around in a bathing suit then you will be unstoppable in any and everything else!)<br />
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I could live with that feeling everyday.<br />
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But wait, there is more. The layers of clothing we wear on hot sunny days when we are not by the water are excessive. Some little boy or girl somewhere probably laboured all day and night so you could wear that cotton shirt, pit stains and all. I think we could spare that poor child and the lucky folks who don't ever sweat but have to watch you walk by with a wet shirt when it never rained that day. I believe it is far less time consuming and much easier to simply make bathing suits and swim trunks than it is to make t-shirts and jeans.<br />
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Call me crazy, but I do believe that the more clothes I wear during the winter the colder I feel. I have argued the point that cold weather creeps into your clothing and cancels out your natural body heat. Perhaps this is the culprit. The more layers I wear the more opportunity for creeping and the more hiding places for success. Furthermore, it only takes but so long for me to adjust to the low temperature.<br />
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Still, I do not expect anyone to walk around in a bathing suit during winter time in Alaska. (I never did find it helpful to think of "hot summer days" during the cold months in order to warm up.)<br />
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As for every other time, I think parading around in swimwear is a great idea. So long as it helps you think of bright, sunny, and happy days, wearing swimwear all the time could really be a positive thing.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7309144994213766293?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-77408246255197957882010-04-21T18:32:00.006-04:002010-04-21T19:10:03.306-04:002010-04-21T19:10:03.306-04:00BetterI realise that when I write I seem to portray myself to be far more negative and/or depressed than I truly am. (I guess that's what makes me a writer.)<br /><br />I never meant to worry anyone, trust me, I am just fine.<br /><br />I have not been sulking, I have not been crying, I have simply been trying to find a way to deal with every obstacle put before me.<br /><br />Yesterday I had three successive failures. The first failure was missing my audition after days of excitement and anticipation. I was let down yet again by one of my UCF friends and in the end all of my excitement was wasted. What was I auditioning for? A group of agents, evidently, brought together by a company that I won't disclose.<br /><br />Before leaving we had decided to do some research to see what we were getting into and saw a bunch of sour blog posts by people who call it a scam, and a few others who said that it was perfectly legit. Nonetheless, I <span style="font-style: italic;">never</span> make my decisions based on what people tell me. Maybe I am stubborn, maybe foolish, but I do like to see things for myself. (Good and bad are relative. Excuse me if I do not trust your judgment.) Besides, what did I have to lose?<br /><br />In the end we decided to go to the later audition so that she could go to class and I could still get to audition. Meanwhile she was in class, I got to watch my team lose to InterMilan after falling apart in the second half. I will admit, Inter played very well, however this is a two leg finale and I am more than confident that Barca will come back from the 2 goal lead in the second leg next week.<br /><br />At the end of the match, I discovered that she did not in effect go to class. She left my room under the pretense and somehow ended up at target. (Hello! Did you not realise I missed my audition for you? So you can go to <span style="font-style: italic;">class. </span>Did you guys take a field trip to target? I think not...) Needless to say, I was a little ticked. Two days in a row.<br /><br />She was on a roll.<br /><br />It did not end there. My third failure was Fabian. I agreed to take <span style="font-style: italic;">Applebee</span> to Walmart after her 4 20 class, only to pick her up and look down to see Fabian overheating. Much like Michael Jackson, I somehow felt as though he was invincible and nothing could go wrong. I sometimes fail to realise that he is already four years old and sometimes just needs a little extra TLC.<br /><br />Things always happen for a reason, right? Maybe I was not meant to go audition.<br /><br />All things considered I think I handled my day quite well. I think by far my biggest problem is that I am not preoccupied enough. If I had more to do on a daily basis, and more people to talk to and hang out with, I would have far less room for complaints.<br /><br />Instead I sit around and analyse. I figure my readers would be much more entertained with my writing about a problem than ranting on about how wonderful and amazing my life is; which by the way, it is.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7740824625519795788?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-77144308804138116102010-04-19T18:09:00.008-04:002010-04-19T19:31:37.616-04:002010-04-19T19:31:37.616-04:00BreakdownIt always amuses me the type of characters who show up at IHOP in the early morning hours. I went there with Caribsa after Universal Knights yesterday and got so many laughs that I swore today was going to be a good day.<br /><br />I was wrong.<br /><br />I woke up at 8 41 for class at nine and then proceeded to drag my feet along for the next hour. I showed up in class about 40 minutes late, only to be there for 15 minutes after missing all the notes and having the teacher dismiss the class early. And before you ask why I bothered to go; he takes attendance--or rather passes around a sign in sheet in which I could probably ask a friend to sign for me on occasions if only I had made any.<br /><br />After that I came home and tried to take a nap. (Considering how exhausted I was after getting a mere 4 hours of sleep last night.) I was awakened by my alarm clock that was set for 1 30pm. I had a doctors appointment at 2 15.<br /><br />Over the past few days I have been having stomach problems. At first I labeled it food poisoning and blamed the cold leftover domino's pizza I ate. After about 3 days of the same problem, I called it a stomach virus. After longer than that, of not being able to eat, nausea, burping, tasting things a second time, and stomach pains, I decided it was about time I get it checked out.<br /><br />Apparently I am becoming lactose intolerant due to the excess amounts of dairy products I have added to my diet. In retrospect, I realise that in one week I ate too many slices of pizza, too many grilled cheese sandwhiches, too many bowls of cereal, and too many yoplait vanilla yogurts.<br /><br />Makes sense.<br /><br />After the doctor, I went to lunch with <span style="font-style: italic;">Chiney Ting</span>. (You might remember her from my <a href="http://anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com/2009/08/sun-sand-and-snorkels.html">snorkel day</a> back home.) Lunch was all good until I made a stop after and found out some unfortunate news.<br /><br />To sum it up, I feel alone. Sure I have met tons of good people here. But many a times I sit and wonder if leaving home was the right thing for me. I'm sure in the long run it will prepare me for the lonely days ahead when I am living alone and working, but I am not convinced that this is what college freedom is supposed to feel like. I miss all my friends back home. I miss feeling like I can go over to their house whenever I feel like it. I miss being able to call and say hey, let's go for sushi. I miss the inside jokes & laughter. I miss being able to be there for each other.<br /><br />I was never the kind of friend who acted more like a significant other than simply a good friend. I'm not the type who gets mad if u don't call me every hour or tell me everything about your life. But being away and living with three mute hermits has made me realise that I do need someone. I need someone I can talk to if necessary. Someone I can call to come over without feeling like a hindrance. Someone I can go visit whenever I don't feel like laying in bed all day. I don't want a friend just when it is convenient, or a friend who has to fit me in their schedule, or who bails on me more than they are here for me.<br /><br />Perhaps I am being selfish. Perhaps the memories of what <a href="http://anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com/2009/10/lost-for-words.html">April 19</a> became after last year are keeping me down. Perhaps when they took my cousin away they also took a part of me. Perhaps I am on an emotional-overload. This could be my estrogen talking. It could be that I just need a nice sunny day to brighten my mood.<br /><br />Instead, though, the day is gloomy; and the rain has washed away all my positive energy and wiped away my big smile. I wish instead it could have washed away all my sorrows and wiped away my hurt.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7714430880413811610?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-87821519605504381542010-04-13T21:12:00.008-04:002010-07-30T10:20:44.614-04:002010-07-30T10:20:44.614-04:00This One Is For YouWhen people say everything happens for a reason, it usually just sounds like a cheap way to skip out on giving a person real advice. It is used so much that it is almost losing its meaning and emphasis. But though it might not help you to feel much better in the moment; in the end when you look back on it, it is always true.<br />
<br />
Being the thinker that I am, I have thought many times about the decisions I have made in my life; both those that were easy and those that were hard. Sometimes I felt as if the whole world was against me--and maybe it was. I can recall many times when I tried to sleep away my problems, only to wake up a few hours later feeling even worse that it was not a dream after all. My heart has sunk so many times that I wonder why it is not beating from the bottom of my foot. <br />
<div><br />
</div><div>Still, I find that for one aspect of my past, I am getting the last laugh. It feels really good now to realise that moving on was the best thing I could have ever done. Though I may not have done it willingly, on my own, or with my head held high, I still find myself relieved and somewhat proud. (I guess the pride I once surrendered to you came back to me tenfold.)<br />
<br />
</div><div>Not that I was ever taught to feel as if I am better than anyone, however I have sense enough to know when someone makes a foolish, for lack of a better word, decision. I have seen you grow up without growing up and now I get to look at you and shake my head. As bad as it sounds, though, I cannot say I am completely surprised. </div><div><br />
</div><div>If only you knew how many times I sat in class writing away all the things that were going through my mind. I still have these things on my computer and now I am able to look at them and laugh, despite knowing the hurt that was the inspiration. (Maybe one day I will post one on my blog, maybe not. I'm not sure if anyone truly cares that much.)</div><div><br />
</div><div>Nevertheless, this is my last one for you.</div><div><br />
</div><div>I just wanted to express how happy I am for all that you put me through, and that I let time do its magic to help me move on to something much more worth my time and effort. Though I almost feel bad that I did not get to help you make better choices and help you see what I saw. Since then, I've learned over and over how much it sucks when you see something in someone that he or she does not even see in themselves. It's a feeling of helplessness that you cannot overcome; like watching from the parking lot as someone you care about jumps from a 10-story window--you just have to stand there and watch.</div><div><br />
</div><div>And just for the record, I still wish you--all 3 of you--all the best that life has to offer. You've made your bed, now lay in it.</div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-8782151960550438154?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-78124852583912345682010-03-24T14:30:00.011-04:002010-03-25T12:07:28.790-04:002010-03-25T12:07:28.790-04:00Can I Go to the Doctor Yet?Evidently the new health care bill was passed by Congress the day before yesterday, so I am assuming that you have been expecting a blog.<br /><br />I had all intentions of writing about this yesterday, but I never found the time. Still, a part of me feels one-sided for even having an opinion because I have no idea what the bill truly entails. (Excuse me if I do my research meanwhile writing this blog.)<br /><br />I have, however, read a few articles on the matter, all with very ambiguous references to what the bill is actually describing. What stood out far more than the implications of the bill itself, were the 34 comments I almost died reading. The American people have proven themselves to be wholeheartedly selfish, yet again. I read about this bill being the beginning of socialism and communism, to hearing about the NWO and the plans for a North American Union, to "Obummer and his vermin," "Hussein and his cronies," "the Democrats from hell," the "Washington Wolf-pack," and "Oblahblah the Antichrist." Evidently, the founding fathers are "turning in their graves" and "we the people" need to make a stand.<br /><br />What a joke.<br /><br />To refrain from putting my foot in my mouth, <span style="font-style: italic;">I will neither be for nor against this bill </span>until I have read it myself<span style="font-style: italic;">.</span> I do not know that will truly be affected, and in all honesty, I am not sure any of us do. As usual, Congress managed to leave out the voice of the general public and keep the details of the bill largely esoteric. (If you have not realised as yet, we don't have nearly as much power, if any at all, as we think we do by writing or voicing opinions, petitioning, or voting.) As evidenced by history, revolutions are the only methods that help us to get our voices heard.<br /><br />Still, I am not fully convinced that this bill is the death of America the "free" and I am still trying to find out what is so "horrendous" about a North American Union. (Other than the Almighty America not being able to stand alone and bully the world anymore! Oh no, say it ain't so.)<br /><br />In my opinion, a reform is absolutely necessary. I have always believed that if free health care can be effective in other developed countries then there is no reason why it could not work here in the US. Albeit, not everything that works overseas can work here, I do believe that if Congress had our best interest in mind, something could come out of this entire debate that would benefit not just the sick, but the working class as well --even if it is not universal health care.<br /><br />What bothers me and seems to be at the forefront of the anti-health reform debate is the amount of power we will be giving to the government in reference to our health. (Of course it would not be as easy as giving us the freedom to choose whether or not we want to go to the doctor every year for a general check-up.) The conspiracy theory within me believes that this is an easy way for the Government to mandate the use of certain drugs and the distribution of vaccinations, much like what is already done now for college and high school students.<br /><br />The idea behind free health care is good; but can we handle it? Can we trust that the government will leave us with our own choices when it comes to getting surgery, medicines, or chemotherapy? Will Doctors still maintain pride in their profession and vow to give their patients the best treatment possible despite his or her payroll?<br /><br />I am afraid the failure of our country to provide its citizens with even simply <span style="font-style: italic;">affordable </span>health care is due to the extensively capitalistic and greedy nature of this society. Upper class Americans would much prefer to leave the power in the hands of private corporations than in the general public--and with good reason. The Government has effortlessly continued to limit what we know about specific policies and programs, all with the underlying desire to maintain the corruption they have so long been dependent on, and keep the people largely ignorant, and believing in whatever conspiracy he or she sees fit.<br /><br />I have been told by my high school Government teacher that Officials do not get elected to instill "change;" they are elected to keep everything the same. One and a half years later, and with a different approach to presidency, Obama and his entire administration are being cursed and condemned for their effort to do something different. The cliche "if it is not broken do not fix it" cannot apply to a system that is not working. If the average middle class homeowner cannot afford to be sick then something seriously needs to be fixed--and it's not just their health.<br /><br />It is not okay to remove a family from their house because their mother was diagnosed with breast cancer and the medical bills piled up and drove them to bankruptcy. I will never be too rich to understand the concept of empathy and compassion.<br /><br />My advice to you, the general public, is that before you go about forming opinions about America becoming socialist, fascist, or communist, please be advised that in many respects, we already are a combination of all three. Why are you worrying about the government having access to your finances, when just a regular bank can clean out your account if you owe them money? I, an average citizen, can go online and find out where you live, what you do for a living, what you drive, where you work, how many people live with you, and what properties you own. Do not be fooled into thinking that anything much will change. If anything, this bill should open your eyes to what is already out.<br /><br />The biggest problem with this bill is CAPITALISM. Not socialism, not fascism, not communism. Those who can already afford to be sick simply refuse to pay taxes for anyone else to be. The big protest has NOTHING TO DO with too much governmental control. No one has a problem if a private company tells you that they cannot cover your current medical bill because you did not file for it before you got into the car accident. No one has a problem with the company telling you that you had a root canal five years ago so now that you have a heart problem you cannot claim it on your insurance. No one has a problem with the plethora of diseases that MediCare will not cover. So what is the difference?<br /><br />There is a chance that the bill can work out. Jobs will be provided, and in due time the average pay check will be higher. There is always room for improvement, and sometimes a change is necessary. But you have to drop the pebble in the water before it can move.<br /><br />I promise you Mr. Big Business, that one less Maserati will not send you to the emergency room. And if it does, what is left of your 10-digit pay check should be able to cover the fees, if any, from that minor heart attack.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7812485258391234568?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-17036289645601691372010-03-20T18:48:00.005-04:002010-03-22T14:39:48.830-04:002010-03-22T14:39:48.830-04:00Gaza vs GullyFor those of you who know me, you know I am never afraid to say, or write, whatever is on my mind; and this is long overdue.<br /><br />About a year ago there was a rift between two Dancehall artistes Mavado and Vybz Kartel. (If you are Jamaican then you know them both; if not you probably just know Mavado.) Before the rift the two men made a few songs together. Afterward, they made songs about each other.<br /><br />You see, an unfortunate aspect of Dancehall music is intense rivalry and, for lack of a better word, hatred. The artistes are never afraid to let it be known that they do not like someone, which happens very often and usually because of something jovial. In fact, the music they create about each other circulates very well around the island. I was never one to support songs that talk very vividly and angrily about violence and murder, but it is practically inescapable.<br /><br />This whole "Gully vs Gaza" thing really began as Mavado, representing the Gullyside, versus Kartel, representing the Gaza. (Based on the violent Gaza strip in the Middle East.) The two men appeared at an annual concert in Jamaica called "Sting" during the Christmas break of 2008, where they battled each other through song, allowing the crowd to choose their favourite entertainer in the end.<br /><br />Eventually, Kartel began building the "Portmore Empire" meanwhile Vado worked with the "Alliance," which has also expanded. The two G's divided Jamaica even more than it already was (which I did not know was possible). All the ignorant people ran around and fought with each other over who supported what and why. In the end, almost everyone took a stance, based on which artist was their favourite.<br /><br />I chose to support the Gaza. I always had a strong love for Kartel's music, and I believe that he is extremely talented. I also had a strange feeling about Mavado. (I will admit I was every bit afraid of him. Especially after seeing him in person and getting the "evil eye.")<br /><br />Unfortunately, for every belief there are extremists, which in this case applies to both the fans and even the musicians themselves. They have all succeeded in dividing my beautiful country with the one thing that is supposed to bring the whole world together, music.<br /><br />Even after an alleged "make-up" between Kartel and Mavado, there is still tension. People are still running around and doing stupid things because of who they support and who they do not. After another artiste, Black Ryno, decided to leave the Gaza, his house was burnt down, and shots have been allegedly fired at his family home. Just the same it is alleged that another member was beat up after being kicked out. This whole "Gaza" thing is starting to sound more like a gang than a music label or group of musicians.<br /><br />This is where I draw the line. It is one thing to make music with clever lyrics, but it is another to take those lyrics to action. Considering the crime rate in Jamaica, I am not even sure why violent music has not yet been banned. And when I say banned, I mean not allowed to even be recorded yet alone played on any radio station, CD, or even at a party. It might sound quite barbaric, but I do think it is necessary.<br /><br />What really prompted me to dedicate an entire blog to the ignorance of the situation, is the fact that even the producers are being targeted with threats. The last time I checked, all they do is make the music. They do not write the song, nor should they even pick a side. Furthermore, the entire argument—from the very beginning— is irrelevent, childish, ignorant, and laughable at best. I actually feel quite embarrassed that this is the type of music coming from my country and that such talented people are so <s>damned</s> ignorant.<br /><br />The Gaza is just continuing to disappoint me, meanwhile Mavado is doing more positive things for Dancehall music. (I have to admit I was very proud the morning I turned on VH1 and saw Mavado. He was in a music video with Wycleff Jean singing about Haiti and the earthquake.)<br /><br />Maybe it is because I know one of those targeted producers personally, but I have decided to renounce my support of Kartel and the Gaza. <span style="font-weight: bold;">This</span> is my official renunciation.<br /><br />For all those who can understand, hillside mi seh!<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-1703628964560169137?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-79271593841662101702010-03-17T16:33:00.003-04:002010-03-20T18:03:38.770-04:002010-03-20T18:03:38.770-04:00The Microwave GenerationUpon sitting in my terrorism class this morning, I heard my teacher make reference to our generation as the "microwave generation." Even though I was not fully paying attention, those two words struck a nerve in my mind.<br /><br />Let's think about this. Re-wind to the days before the microwave was invented. That gets rid of all of those microwaveable instant foods like Chef Boyardee and Cup Soup. Imagine everyday life without a microwave. We would have to rely on the stove top & the oven for everything; even if we just want a cup of warm milk to drink before bed. Leftovers would require a pot and a lot of patience, not to mention we would have to cook or buy restaurant food much more often. I'm not sure if our generation could handle it, although it may sound quite trivial and easy to manage.<br /><br />We have been told many times that our generation is moving at a fast-pace. I have observed some of the changes from my lifetime alone, and often wonder what to expect for the next few years. I have lived through radios with only a few stations, to tape players, CD players, MP3s, and iPods.<span style=""> </span>(Microsoft Word does not even correct those anymore.) I have gone from watching black & white shows of I Love Lucy to High-Definition TV that can be paused and re-wound. If I decide to have children, showing them a VHS, a CD player, a Nokia flashlight phone with no camera that can only make & receive calls or text messages, or a television that is bigger in the back than the remote is, would leave them in sheer amazement and probably with a few laughs. We have gone from video recorders and cameras without screens, to touch screen cameras that can take and show both pictures and videos. (My father is currently fighting a losing battle in an effort to convert our old VHS tapes to DVD's so we can replay some of our old family videos; there is nothing in our house that can play a tape from an “ancient” <i style="">video recorder</i>.)<br /><br />And this is all just in my two-decade lifetime. I cannot imagine how my elders feel about all of the rapid changes that they have seen take place over the past few years, coming from record players and televisions with only a handful of channels. (I've heard talk of a future with pause-&-play touch screen televisions that not even I can begin to fathom.) We have all taken advantage of these luxuries, and have gotten quite comfortable with their convenience. Even I am guilty of it as I sit here and write this blog from my cellular telephone. But it certainly leaves me to wonder; when is it going to be too much? Will it ever get to a point when such advancements will have gone overboard?<br /><br />This brings me back to the statement my professor made; He called us "the microwave generation" because we want things <i style="">now</i>. We never want to wait for anything. We want express lines at Disney, we want to fast-forward through commercials, we want to see the pictures we took right away, we want to get online as soon as we turn on the computer, we want to reheat our food in less than two minutes, we want to hear the song right now...<br /><br />Remember America Online? Where you had to connect to the internet through use of dial-up? The sounds of the computer dialling a number & trying to establish a connection seem so ancient now.<br /><br />Still, I am not sure I can say I ever missed out on much of life by sitting at the desk and waiting an extra few minutes for my computer to connect. What is the rush anyway? We only fast-forward through the commercials to then sit in front of the television all day. As fast as the internet connects, we still spend hours online pretending what we are doing is important. The only example I've used that makes any sense to me is the concept of the microwave. (Food is my weakness.) Other than satisfying hunger, what are we in such a hurry to do?<br /><br />As far as I am concerned, the slow dial-up was quite the deterrent. It made me think twice about sitting in front of a computer screen—which is a great thing. I spent far more time socialising with people of whom I could actually see and feel, as opposed to a picture or name in a chat room or instant message.<br /><br />Do not get me wrong, I'm sure technology has helped to reunite and rekindle friendships all across the world, and I am certainly not knocking that. I just think we should slow it down a little and take more time to be with our families, or go outside and take a walk and observe whatever is left of the land on which we live. Instead of spending hundreds of dollars on the new flat screen or cellular telephone, take a trip with your significant other to a place you've never been. (It quite possibly could save your otherwise fast-paced and unsuccessful marriage.) Tour a museum. Learn how to swim, or how to ride a horse. Go on a road trip to visit distant relatives; those few hours in the car make for good bonding time and irreplaceable memories.<br /><br />There is so much more to this world we live in than just gadgets and gizmos.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-7927159384166210170?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-23545034114139298902010-03-12T11:48:00.007-05:002010-03-12T16:31:19.548-05:002010-03-12T16:31:19.548-05:00Beach, Park, RangeI had never seen as many people at the beach as I did on Wednesday afternoon.<br /><br />It was the one day this week that was both warm and sunny and the entire Florida population of spring breakers made their way to South Beach for a much needed beach day.<br /><br />When I approached the beach in the mid-afternoon I saw so many people that I swore there was some kind of concert. It reminded me of ATI in Negril Jamaica because that is the only time I am accustomed to such a large crowd gathering on the beach.<br /><br />At first the day was very confused. It seemed like the closer we got to the beach the cloudier it became. (Not to mention the high winds that were blowing away Fabian.) Right before we got on the bridge to cross over onto the islands, we were held up in a traffic jam. It was a convoy of two cars and the person behind us, <span style="font-style: italic;">whiplash, </span>was following for directions. All of a sudden, she got a hunch and decided to take a "detour" in order to avoid the traffic.<br /><br />I knew right away the detour would be a failure because there is only one bridge, but we decided to go along for the adventure since she was so convinced her GPS was telling her where to go. (I have a thing against GPS systems because I feel like people rely on them so much that they will never truly learn how to get around.)<br /><br />In the end, after <span style="font-style: italic;">whiplash</span> got lost, panicked, and waited for us to find her, we finally made it back on the bridge for traffic that lasted all of about 10 minutes, if that much.<br /><br />Eventually, by the time we arrived, even the clouds went away and we were all able to feel like the beach was a good idea after all. The wind never really died down and the water was extremely cold, but being the mermaid I am, I had to go in there anyway and it started to feel really good after a while. My <span style="font-style: italic;">prima esposa</span> was the only one with enough balls to brave the cold along with me and we acted like little children trying to jump over and dive through the never-ending waves.<br /><br />Wednesday was a good day.<br /><br />Yesterday was a little less eventful until about 4 o clock when <span style="font-style: italic;">father </span>and <span style="font-style: italic;">mother dearest</span> decided we should all go in the park and cook dinner. It reminded me of my high school days when we looked for any reason to have a family day in the park.<br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic;">Applebee</span> and I went on the swing, the parentals cooked and talked with some friends we coincidentally happened upon, and the boys played football. When the sign was given that dinner was ready everyone dropped what they were doing and gathered around the grille and picnic table. By this time the sun had set and we had a "phone light dinner" by the lake. After dinner, we headed over to the shotgun range where <span style="font-style: italic;">father, brother unlucky, Lue</span>, and I all proved to be extremely rusty and in dire need of practise.<br /><br />Still, it was all in good fun. At least now I know what I can dedicate myself to when I come home for summer vacation.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-2354503411413929890?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-91376629997826267902010-03-09T20:49:00.008-05:002010-03-20T18:34:46.902-04:002010-03-20T18:34:46.902-04:00Out of My MindI spent today trying to get my mind off what has made me lose 3 pounds in two days.<br /><br />I am down to 108. When was the last time I weighed that much? I have no idea. Don't get me wrong, my aim is 105. But I had no intentions of losing the weight like this. What can I say though. I brought this upon myself by making the most ridiculous mistake that I am not sure I can live with.<br /><br />I woke up extremely early today again because I am having trouble sleeping. (Not even my favourite hobby is enough to keep me out of my head.) I stayed up until the afternoon when I decided to get up and get ready for a dim sum day with my friends, as opposed to laying in bed all day as I have been doing. Dim sum has unofficially been established as our little "thing," however this time we decided to switch it up a little. We went to a new place that was recommended by <span style="font-style: italic;">stingy chin</span>, who is Jamaican Chinese, and we all agreed to test it out.<br /><br />The food was very good. I actually ate, for the first time since the week started, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. The jokes and laughs were enough to keep me sane throughout our two hour dining experience. At the end, when it was time to part, the frown returned to my face. I was back in my head again; but not for long.<br /><br />After dim sum, <span style="font-style: italic;">brother unlucky, applebee, </span>another Jamaican Chiney<span style="font-style: italic;">--Lue--, </span>and I<span style="font-style: italic;"> </span>went to visit<span style="font-style: italic;"> granny.</span> We spent the next few hours there chatting and eating ice cream until now as I am back home and back to sulking. I actually broke my Lenten sacrifice and went on facebook. I did not check notifications, friend requests, event invitations or anything. I was on for less than a minute, only to see something from yesterday that completely broke my heart. Right there at the top of my news feed.<br /><br />I guess that is what I get for breaking my sacrifice.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-9137662999782626790?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-511600189947222962.post-33130836163337330232010-03-08T17:41:00.009-05:002010-03-20T18:35:26.699-04:002010-03-20T18:35:26.699-04:00Something I NeedIn contrast to my previous blog, and just to show how much of a roller coaster life is, last night going into this morning was probably the worst night I have had in years. I cannot even begin to explain how I feel, nor do I even want to. But here is something that I always read whenever life hits me with a punch.<br /><br />I actually got it from my 8th grade advanced math teacher Ms. Arnold on my last day in junior high school. She was certainly not a favourite teacher of mine, but I automatically fell in love with it, as I read it together with a friend, it bringing tears to both of our eyes. It always makes me feel even just a little bit better in times of turmoil, so I thought I would share it with you all.<br /><p></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" >Sometimes people come into</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><u><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);" lang="EN-US">your</span></u></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" >life and you know</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 102);" lang="EN-US">right away</span></i></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" >that they are</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p> meant to be there</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >,</span> <span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" >to serve some sort of purpose</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" >, </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";color:red;" lang="EN-US">teach you a lesson, or help you</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 204);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > figure out</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >who you are</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 204);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >or what you want to become.</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(153, 204, 0);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >You never know</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:purple;" lang="EN-US" >who</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;">these<b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> people may be; </span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">your roommate,</span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> neighbor, </span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">professor</span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">, </span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">long lost friend,<o:p></o:p></span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 102);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > lover</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 255);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >or even a complete stranger who</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span lang="EN-US" style="color:fuchsia;">when you lock eyes</span></i><i style=""><span lang="EN-US" style="color:blue;"> </span></i></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 255);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >with them you know that at</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><o:p></o:p><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> every </span></b></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >moment that they will</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><u><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">affect your life</span></u></b></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >in some profound way. And<o:p></o:p> sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 204);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >horrible,</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(153, 153, 153);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >painful</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><o:p></o:p><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> and</span></b></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 102);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >unfair,</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">but in reflection you</span></b></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 153);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >realized</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">your potential, strength, will power, or</span></b><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><i style=""><u><span style=";font-family:Arial;color:red;" lang="EN-US">heart.</span></u><span style=";font-family:";color:lime;" lang="EN-US"> EvErYtHiNg</span></i></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:blue;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0); text-transform: uppercase;" lang="EN-US">happens for a reason</span></i></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >.</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><s><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);" lang="EN-US">Nothing</span></s></i></span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >happens by chance or by means of</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >good luck.</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >Illness, injury, love, lost</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > moments or</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><u><span style="color: rgb(214, 0, 147);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US">true greatness</span></u></i></span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >and sheer</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 255);font-family:Arial;" lang="EN-US">stupidity</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >all occur to test</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 51);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > the</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(153, 51, 255);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >limits of your</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 255);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > soul.</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >Without these small tests, if they</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > be </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">EvEnTs</span></i><i style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);" lang="EN-US"> </span></i></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >illnesses or relationships; life</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > would</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >be like a</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >smoothly paved,</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >straight, flat road to</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><u><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">nowhere</span></u></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >safe and comfortable,</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:fuchsia;" lang="EN-US" ><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> but</span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><i style=""><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family:Garamond;">dull</span></i></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 255);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US">and utterly pointless.</span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></b><br /></span></p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:fuchsia;" lang="EN-US" >The people you meet who</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><u><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US">affect your life</span></u></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:fuchsia;" lang="EN-US" >and the successes and downfalls you</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 153);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></b> experience, </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >CREATE</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > who you are, and even the </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">bad experiences</span></i></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > can be learned from.<o:p></o:p> In fact, they are probably the</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 0);font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >most poignant and important ones</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >.</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > If someone<o:p></o:p> hurts you,</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >betrays you</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >or</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" >breaks your heart,</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >forgive them</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;">for they have helped you<o:p></o:p><b style=""><span lang="EN-US" style="color:gray;"> LEARN</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" >more about</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >trust</span><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 153);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" >and</span><span style=";font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(0, 204, 0);font-family:Arial;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >the importance of</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><u><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">being cautious</span></u></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" >to whom</span><span style=";font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;color:lime;" lang="EN-US" >you</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > open your heart.</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >If someone loves you</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 51, 102);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >,</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:purple;" lang="EN-US" >love them back</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >unconditionally,</span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > NOT ONLY </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >because</span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > they <b style=""><i style="">love you, but because they are</i></b> </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >teaching you</span><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 255);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > <b style=""><i style="">to love and</i></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">opening your heart</span></i></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 102);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US"> and eyes to things.</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><br /></span></p><p style="text-align: left;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">Make everyday count.</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 102);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > Appreciate </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:Sylfaen;color:red;" lang="EN-US">every moment</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 102);font-family:Sylfaen;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > and take from it everything<o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US">you possibly can, for you may</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><u><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US">never</span></u></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US">be able to experience it </span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 153, 0);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US">again.</span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-family:Sylfaen;" lang="EN-US"> Talk to people you have never</span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 102, 0);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> talked to before &</span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);font-family:Garamond;font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >actually listen,</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US">let yourself</span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b></span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >fall in love,</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" ><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 204);font-family:Garamond;" lang="EN-US">break free<o:p></o:p></span></b> and set your sights high.</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";color:lime;" lang="EN-US">Hold your head up</span></b></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >because you have every right to. Tell<o:p></o:p> yourself you are a</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >great individual</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >and believe in yourself for if not,</span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >no one else will believe in<o:p></o:p> you</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >either. You can</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >make of your life anything</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255);font-size:130%;" lang="EN-US" >you wish.</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";color:red;" lang="EN-US">create your own life</span></b></span><span style="font-size:130%;"><o:p></o:p><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";" lang="EN-US"> and then</span></b></span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style=";font-family:";font-size:130%;color:fuchsia;" lang="EN-US" >GO OUT</span><span style=";font-size:130%;color:red;" lang="EN-US" > </span><span style="font-size:130%;"><i style=""><span style="color: rgb(255, 204, 0);font-family:Arial;" lang="EN-US">and </span></i><b style=""><span style=";font-family:";color:blue;" lang="EN-US">live it.</span></b></span><span style=";font-size:11pt;color:red;" lang="EN-US" ><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/511600189947222962-3313083616333733023?l=anotheraspiringjournalist.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Meishahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17162400114413531075noreply@blogger.com0